Dear God,
So I guess I am struggling to be virtuous. I really want to keep my purity but if i can't reign in my self control, I don't know if I'll be able to. This is not good, as you well know. I know that part of your kind and loving fatherness could also be daddy with a gun, but I really hope that's not the case. I'm not looking to be judged, at least not yet. I want your forgiveness, for not only me but Tyler because tonight we almost had sex and that's not acceptable. We came pretty close. I know that we need your guidance a little okay maybe alot more heavily in our life and I know maintaining self control isn't easy by any standards but we really really really need your guidance because we cannot do this without you Lord. We can not. Theres no way. Im not really comfortable confessing this to a priest. I just want it between you and me. Its not that tyler or I are bad people rather more normal in that we mess up sometimes and struggle and thats when we really need you most. Please stay with us. Amen
With Love,
Your Daughter,
Sossina
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Friday, May 4, 2012
Saturday, February 25, 2012
I Hate it God
Is that all we're designed to do are we condemned to go one hurting each other forever? I wont blame you god, its not your fault. I am just so upset. I dont have as much control as they think, and I'm always away so i never get to be there to say anything. They lock me out and as much as I hope that they might like me theres a good chance that they dont and I hate it, I hate it God. I never get to be there and it sucks. Maybe his parents will be the downfall of him. Im just not sure any more. I know I said I'm open to anything once, but this isnt one of those times. I know im probably just overreacting. His long hair doesnt mean anything to him as it does to me or as mine does to me. Why today? You know im only good for one crisis a day. You know it. I guess it just hurts. I'm so thankful to have the time with my mom today and I guess a little part of me was convincing myself that i was okay with not seeing him today, not talking to him for the rest of today. And it was working I was starting to be okay with the fact that people think its okay to rob the little time i have with him. I love my mom and today was special but this, this just through me off my cliff of okay. I was okay without this. Im getting buried in the avalanche of my life and I HATE IT. I really do. I'm so tired ive had a migrane and i know i have plenty of homework and this is the last thing i needed. Im sure what's frustrating me and making me upset in my talking to you is very small compared to other peoples, but this is whats hurting me now, so please don't forget me.
Amen
Sossina
Amen
Sossina
Thursday, February 23, 2012
:(
i would do it just to spite him God, i know i would and im trying so very hard not to. :( Perhaps im overeacting, and most likely i am. Please save me.
Amen
Sossina
Amen
Sossina
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